*hitting the backspace button
"Heey it's been quite a while how are you? Guess you're doing super good?"
*hitting the backspace button
"Hey, how are you? Still remember me? " Nooo...
*hitting the backspace button
"Hey ssup, how you doing? " Wait...
*hitting the backspace button
"Hey ssup ?"
*hitting the backspace button
"Hey!"
*hitting the backspace button, pondered for a moment, and hit the close button turning my attention to other site right away.
It took me quite a long time to finally decide not to send out this email. I mean, it's nothing wrong to send an email seeing how he's doing, i just can't bring myself to get back in touch with him just yet. Probably, i need more time to make sure i'm all good to not get into any state of negativity as i just suddenly reminded of that point of my life when my feelings kept going back and forth which is nothing but a pure torturing to my emotions and was literally heading nowhere for geez, such a long time. I will never forget the moment i was given a cold shoulder when trying every possible way to patch things up.
That feeling just...so exhausting i don't ever want to feel it again, anymore, ever.
I just don't know what i should react to his reply, if only he did.
Or i foresee myself to might have ended up waiting for the reply day and night and can't even go to bed without checking my inbox making sure that there's "nothing'' new in my inbox.
It isn't much of a surprise for myself still feeling in such a way because i'm an emotional libra with all those, i would say, positive trait, tend to hold on to things, especially relationship, for so long even if it's gone for quite a long time. I sometimes still find myself crying over the death of my doggie 8 years ago, all i know is that i am just missing Poppy ( dog ) too much i don't even want to forget every single detail about him.
Same applies to all my previous relationships :)
Guess I should now go back to play with my piano before i get too sentimental, just for this night.
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