Be grateful

Another day off. Just sitting around on my bum like a laze so I decided to update a new blog from the dream I had last night.

Somehow I notice that, it’s really either I refuse to sleep at night or just live in the same dream that always appears in each night rather than waking up to the reality. A night hardly passed without the recurring dream that contains the same message plays over and over again in the head. My eyes lit up, breathe for a minute, and immediately make a leap back to the dream with the ending that often turns out to be somewhat disappointing because believe it or not, your dream is always a reflection of reality, and as you may have noticed ( if you’re following my blog and read all my stories ), it never once something close to positive. As much as I wish to stay positive and protect myself from all sorta negative vibes, I give in at all times and fall into a state of depression and as things get a little worse I’m now officially having an existential crisis. 

I tend to write down the dream I had as soon as I wake up each time trying to remember the details to see if it’s trying to tell me something I should know.  

I question the purpose of my life, the things I am hoping for, and what do I really want to achieve living my life as a me, myself. I have once read it somewhere saying that human only need three things to be happy with their lives, first, someone to love, second, something to do, and followed by something to hope for. I’m not even having things close to any of those. To me, all men are pricks; what I’m currently doing don’t lead me anywhere better; I need courage to live in my dream but it just won’t come in an eye blinks.  

There’s a lot of times when I have a baj problems I just wish to lay on my bed and not thinking about anything then sleep through it until the next day.

But then..

Something strikes me in my head.

I am living a place with roof over the top,

I have difference choices of food to eat 3 times a day,

I have a fridge to keep my foods,

I have a closet to keep all my clothes,

I have a car to drive,

And I am able to write things that you’re reading right now!

So I consider myself so much luckier than the 75% of the population living in this world!

I know, but sometimes just can’t help whining about the problems I have. I’ll try to take time for little things and think it through. Or maybe, im just good at writing negative journal  and that’s when all sorta ideas forming a light bulb above my head that ends up another emotional post that makes you feel exhausted reading it lol. I know I know ‘cause I feel the same lol.

Just...

Learn to be grateful.