A rough start, well

It just another peaceful night with a lot of thoughts running through my mind, again. Telling myself there's nothing to get so uptight about because since I'm bringing all this to myself and should've expected this to happen one day sooner. It didn't cross my mind even for a second to have this thing started off this way, so wonderful so perfect that you don't see the flip side coming or even if you did you choose to be ignorant for at least once. What a pity. I'm guilty as charged in this case, I made it to become a whole lot complicated which now met with a feeling of supreme disconsolation I can't forgive myself just yet. A few dosage of anesthetic is all I wish for right now to alleviate the prickly pain I'm having this second. I'll be fine the day after don't you worry about me. Everything just happened on a whim without me thinking about the possible consequences we might be facing as time passes and now that the situation calls for a drastic change it just coming too soon I don't even have enough time to know how to react, which now serve me right for being so selfish at the first place, being so consumed by it that I don't even want to bother anything else. It's pouring outside, perhaps it's time for me to close my eyes and revalue myself, who I am and what I want to be.